I just want the crows to be my friends

Crows are absolutely fascinating animals. They're intelligent, social, humorous, and memorable birds. They've been observed using the flow of traffic to crack nuts, then waiting for a red light to go collect their prize. It's been shown they both remember and recognize individual human faces, and they will hold grudges, but they'll also form friendships. They absolutely hate owls and most raptors, and they will harass, harry, and chase them out of their territory. They've been observed congregating where a member of the murder has died, seemingly in an act of either mourning or investigation. They will collect, play with, and occasionally gift small trinkets and shiny bits, with no discernible motive other than they seem to find it enjoyable. Humans who've befriended crows often receive small gifts, sometimes in incredible fashion, like one woman who dropped her keys off a bridge and returned home to find them waiting for her, retrieved and returned by her local murder, in the spot where she always fed them. I've had crows laugh at me when I slipped on ice. Crows will solve puzzles for fun, both in the wild and captivity, and they seem to prefer food they have to think for, rather than food freely given. They are just the absolute coolest birds, and I love them.


I've been trying to make friends with the crows in my neighborhood for the better part of a year, and I think I'm making some progress, as you can see here.

That was yesterday. Today, I had an absolutely rager, a verified banger, one for the ages, a festive fiesta, a delightful crow party, held in front of my house, the parking lot across the street, and every tree, rooftop, and ledge surrounding it. It was wonderful, take a look -


If that's not the most crows you've seen in one place, I am jealous of you, and please introduce me to your crow friends.


Next thing I'd like to do, as soon as I'm able, is build a small feeding platform for them, either a standalone or attached to the patio railing. They like to perch on edges, especially when feeding, and they like routine, so I'm trying to keep to some semblance of a schedule. I hope to create an economy of sorts, where I supply the crows with peanuts, occasionally meat treats, and water, and they, in turn, will supply me with shiny trinkets...and possibly a vast crow army with which I can enact plans for global domination, but that's really secondary to the shiny trinkets.


Stay tuned for further updates on my crow friends, aka crow bros, aka brows, aka cros, aka crow army, aka crarmy, aka The Bois.

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